We the founders of the Lavender Mask hereby declare our strong animosity toward the Glitch Anti-Drug Task Force. These ignorant BUTTINSKYS have repeatedly attempted to deny us our patriotic right to stupefy ourselves through the medium of that almighty herb the purple flower.
What is Ur if we, its rightful and tax-paying citizens, are denied the very happiness the eleven sacred Giants set out to bestow upon us millions of years ago? This detestable opposition to the omnipotent herb chills us to the very bone - the BONE, I tell you!!!
Do not think that this hateful violation of our rights as citizens will go unavenged. We will persist in assaulting the task force until PURPLE FLOWERS - and ONLY purple flowers - are glorified all throughout Ur and beyond.
We demand to know - what harm could this delightful flower possibly impart on the user? It is completely harmless and all-natural - often munched straight from the soil! The only effect it has is an enchanting sense of peace and security - which we will tirelessly defend the right to until the very end!!!
WHO'S WITH ME!?