Do you have a secret Glitch crush? Too shy to let them know?
Try LORD BACON-O's ANONYMOUS REMAILING SERVICE!
Want to repay a kindness but don't want the fuss them knowing who you are?
Try LORD BACON-O's ANONYMOUS REMAILING SERVICE!
Need to send message but keep your identity secret?
Then you should try LORD BACON-O's ANONYMOUS REMAILING SERVICE!
Our service is the most trusted in Ur. Your secrets stay secrets with our staff. In operation since the moment I hit post topic, not once has LBARS failed to deliver its message or have we revealed a name. Fast-ish, reliable, and cheaper then any of our competitors, what more could you ask for?
HOW DOES IT WORK?
Simple! That's how!
All you need to do is send the message you want relayed and who you want it relayed to (with a link to their profile). Attach any items you wish to send. Also attach 100 currants*.
Make your subject line "LBOARS."
As soon as you can say "Yoga frog, get out of my face!", our staff of highly trained individual resends the message and items to your desired recipient.**
BUT HOW WILL I KNOW THEY RECEIVED IT?
While we can't promise they will read the thing, we do send you confirmation that it was sent. AND if they wish to reply, that is covered in original cost!***
HOW CAN WE TRUST YOU TO NOT TELL PEOPLE?
Because we swear we won't. We double swear.
Not only that, but starting next test, we double dog swear.
CAN I SEND ANY MESSAGE?
No. LBOARS will not send what we consider hate mail. Our guidelines are very clear - up to our own moral compass and arbitrary whim.
However, if we consider a message inappropriate, we tell you so, return any items and the fee PLUS refund the cost you paid for the message. (20 currants).****
So what are you waiting for? Send a secret admirer note today with...
LORD BACON-O'S ANONYMOUS REMAILING SERVICE!
When you absolutely positively need it sent pretty quickly but more importantly secretly.
TRY IT TODAY!*****
*100 currant fee pays for: The cost of mailing, the cost of paper and the cost of one reply from the recipient and a nominal processing fee. Not included is any fees paid to Frog Delivery. We also do not send priority, so don't ask.
**Mail will be sent in a timely matter depending on whether or not we are online. But should be in less than 24 hours. Way less most like. Maybe ten minutes. Maybe not.
***Please to not make inquiries as to whether they've sent a reply or not. If they do, you'll get it.
****So you'd get 120 currants back. While we don't accept hate mail, if you want to send plop or guano with a nice note or even no note, go to it.
*****Or when the world is next open.
(LBOARS™ is owned and operated by The Elbow Grease Industries Company Corporation Enterprise Holdings™.)
(All use of ™ is Satirical™ in nature.)