Topic

Abiding by the rules

So, if the game is closed, people shouldn't be able to gain levels, badges, skills and other such stuff in the game right?

So why does kevbob always have new stuff while the game is down? Answer? He's a witch.

So what should we do about these magicians, hackers, cheaters by any other name? I say we petition the developers to allow us to burn the witches. Or we can have a trial for them first - to be on the safe side. The trial shall consist of striking them through the heart with an iron spike. Only a witch could live through that. If they live, then we know that we must burn them.

On that note:

I think I may have discovered a full coven of these witches. Please note their name and appearance:


Plus one if you think we should get a 'burn witch' ability.

Posted 15 months ago by Lilac Subscriber! | Permalink

Replies

  • Actually, Lilac, those "witches" are developers themselves. They're in-game only because they're testing it. XD

    Hope that clarifies it for ya! Although I do agree that I wish I could be in-game too. Alas, us plebeians must wait until the official launch to have 24/7 access to the game whenever we want.
    Posted 15 months ago by LitaPie Subscriber! | Permalink
  • If you send a letter to the creators, you will find out that are all staff and therefore have every right to be there!! If not for their dedication and hardwork, we would not be able to play or even have Glitch, so yea the Awsomers need to play.
    Posted 15 months ago by ~Annie~ Subscriber! | Permalink
  • I need to find a way to use my joking voice in-text. : (

    I know. I put it in my status too cause kevbob is on my friends list and needs a minor giggle.
    For some reason I think the thought of him being burned as a witch strikes him as humorous.
    Posted 15 months ago by Lilac Subscriber! | Permalink
  • I really don't know why everyone seems to think these practitioners of the blackest of magiks are "game developers," that is absurd.  Computers and magik do not mix, it is a known fact.

    I vote for making them take my foolproof Witch Test.  All they have to do is jump up in the air and come right back down again, like all us normal, non-witch Glitches.  Simple, right?  I even have a nice big chamber called Plexus meant just for Witch Testing.   Let's round 'em up!!! >:D

    ;)
    Posted 15 months ago by Jannisary Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Brilliant!

    Any other witch testing ideas? If this goes anything like I'm hoping, there be lots of other people that need framing.... ere, testing.
    Posted 15 months ago by Lilac Subscriber! | Permalink
  • I HAVE FURTHER PROOF!

    These witches are notorious not only for wandering about in a nonexistent (closed) world, but also for returning to "mysterious vortexes" and "impossibilities" whilst the world is open! And even the moon! Only witches can breathe on the moon!

    They are evading us in favor of their evil lairs in places we cannot follow! Burn the witches!

    *after they hit that lovely red button to let us all back in, o'course....
    Posted 15 months ago by Jennyanydots Subscriber! | Permalink
  • I agree they must be witches, I was turned into a newt!

    It's going to sound horribly morbid if I suggest that there are always the traditional methods of stoning or chucking them in a lake, so I won't.

    Another option, see if they own any brooms!
    Posted 15 months ago by Serilyn Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Whats the deal with these "devs" I keep hearing about? I thought the game was made by giants.
    Posted 15 months ago by Tofu Casserole Subscriber! | Permalink
  • The Literalnet strikes again! With one hand it slams through the shields of sarcasm, and with the other strangles the throat of humor!
    Posted 15 months ago by Skwid Subscriber! | Permalink
  • @Lilac -- I don't think you need a different joking voice. I think suggesting the "iron stake through the heart" test is sufficient evidence of sarcasm.

    btw, iron stakes would be excellent for elven vampires, but we could do the witch test at a nice warm beach. If they drown, they're not witches; if they don't drown, they will have to be burned at the stake. It all seems perfectly reasonable to me.

    PS You really do need access to the game soon. That's quite a list you've assembled.
    Posted 15 months ago by kastlin Subscriber! | Permalink
  • (FWIW, the fact that you used the dev's names in your witch list, rather than their usernames, contributed to the joke for me.)

    SEEMS VERY LEGIT AND OFFICIAL. You've clearly done admirable research about these heathens, and I am left with no recourse save to believe these claims about their witchery and volunteer a few bales of hay to help with the burning. 

    Everyone knows witches cannot resist creepy-crawlies. Where an ordinary glitchen will see a cockroach, a witch will see a tasty snack! So now the real question... Have you seen any of their number eating batterflies whole?

    Everyone also knows that batterflies are completely inedible. 
    Posted 15 months ago by Haiku Subscriber! | Permalink
  • :O Down with the witches! (after we all get back in of course)
    Posted 15 months ago by Emlinel Subscriber! | Permalink
  • kastlin wrote: If they drown, they're not witches
    It's actually easier than that. If they weigh more than a duck they're witches. A fairly simple scale would suffice. Though beaches are fairly prevalent at the various Glitch headquarters now that I think about it.
    Posted 15 months ago by Skwid Subscriber! | Permalink
  • @Serilyn

    A newt?
    Posted 15 months ago by Lilac Subscriber! | Permalink
  • love it Lilac :)  Heathens!! .... and you know, Haiku might be onto something about the missing butterflies - so that's where they all went......
    Posted 15 months ago by icatchm0nkeys Subscriber! | Permalink
  • @Lilac: Well... I got better...
    Posted 15 months ago by Serilyn Subscriber! | Permalink
  • I saw the newt joke coming, and I still giggled when I read "I got better."

    Is this an excuse to go on a nice vaca-- I mean, field trip to the residences of the assumed witches to perform the necessary tests? It could be a nice bonding activity. C: 
    Posted 15 months ago by Haiku Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Methinks some clarification is in order.

    Burn = offer purple to
    Witch = hoopy frood
    Test = lovely holiday

    So burn your nearest witch after sending them for testing ASAP!
    Posted 15 months ago by Jennyanydots Subscriber! | Permalink
  • I got ma retractable pin!!! You keep 'em down and I'll poke them with the needle!  If they feel pain they are normal glitches otherwise they are witches! Burn the witch!!! Burn!!!

    Of course we could always do the trials the pterry way... A nice dinner, a good night's sleep,  two gold coins in their shoes and some tea in the morning. Then chuck them in a pond  - Witch trial method copyright Miss Tick ;)
    Posted 15 months ago by madragoran Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Ahh, I say let them perform their majik first and open up the doors to UR.. then you can go about poking, stabbing, drowning, etc.. etc...
    Posted 15 months ago by MzMunchken Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Do you think any of them possess the telltale hairy nose wart? In my head they all are "dev"astatingly attractive and fabulously brilliant - I am crushed!
    Posted 15 months ago by gallagirl Subscriber! | Permalink
  • +1 to all of the above.
    Posted 15 months ago by Nanookie Subscriber! | Permalink
  • I never believed in magic until you showed me this ultimate proof Lilac!

    Now I am a believer and will do whatever you suggest.  (As long as it involves playing Glitch)

    ;-)
    Posted 15 months ago by Cassandria Subscriber! | Permalink
  • *starting to gather firewood and tinder* I have an even simpler method to deduce whether or not they are witches.....witches have familiars, right? So, we just do a quick check to see who has a "pet" with them, especially a cat. Hmm...I know of at least one. Others may try to "fool" us by having a dog, but we can see through that too.
    Posted 15 months ago by marycontrary Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Thanks for the giggles, Lilac. I have thoroughly enjoyed following this thread!
    Posted 15 months ago by Mollie Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Lilac, you're joking voice is fine.  Some people are so literal that they just can't hear it, or they can't make the leap of imagination required for irony. Chances are, those people don't enjoy the same movies that you do.

    I'm a comic and those folks used to drive me up a tree, because they make you explain the joke, which kills it.  Actually it still bothers me.  What helps is that my mother-in-law, a lovely person, is very literal and totally gullible.  If you told her the grass had turned blue and the sky green, she would believe you and peek out the window to see.  If a person takes everything at face value, it never occurs to them that there might be a second meaning and then you get... nothing in the funny department.

    We can also think of the comically tone deaf as a gift.  According to the definition of irony, there has to be an audience who does not get the joke.  Of course, that means the joke is on them, but what the hell, they won't get it anyway, and they are comically tone deaf, so they deserve it.  (woops there I go, up a tree again)

    Here's a good explanation of Irony from Robert Paul Wolff's About Philosophy:
    Irony is "a kind of speech or communication that assumes a double audience.  When a speaker makes an ironic statement, he seems to be directing it at one group of people.  This group is called the first, or superficial audience.  But in reality he is directing his remarks at a second audience, called the real audience.  His statement has a double meaning, and the trick of the irony is that the second audience understands both meanings.  The second audience knows that the first audience has misunderstood, so the irony becomes a private joke between the speaker and the second audience -- a joke at the expense of the first audience which never suspects a thing"
    Posted 15 months ago by ArtOfHands RoboGirl Subscriber! | Permalink
  • I think that it's possible that you might need to have seen the other threads that this one is lampooning to get the joke right away.  Perhaps some of us just don't read the forums quite as obsessively as, for example, I do!

    I am enjoying having links to all the staff profiles in one place, so I can connect the people to the glitches!  Fun!
    Posted 15 months ago by Varekai Subscriber! | Permalink
  • So they're made of wood, then? Shall we build a bridge out of 'em?

    Also, Zany, you are one hoopy frood yourself. 42!
    Posted 15 months ago by RM Subscriber! | Permalink
  • I have further proof that they are Witches:

    Many of them have been to HELL AND BACK. No mere mortal could enter and exit Hell as easily as squishing some grapes into hellish wine.

    In conclusion, they MUST be witches. When the tiny Closed sign is removed later I say we find them and splank them!
    Posted 15 months ago by Avery♥ Subscriber! | Permalink
  • First the splankings....
    Posted 15 months ago by Varekai Subscriber! | Permalink
  • further evidence of the above listed glitches being witches:

    they are ALWAYS afk, but never seem to be hungry or angry, like us mere mortals when they wake up. mood loss? energy loss? not for a glitch witch!

    there is something fishy about this. very very fishy.
    Posted 15 months ago by greenkozi Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Thanks for this posting lilac, it is really giving me a giggle and it is nice to have a complete list of dev's like that, some I've spoken to but never realised they were devs. Sorry witches :)
    Posted 15 months ago by Latajea Subscriber! | Permalink
  • witches, latajea, witches!
    Posted 15 months ago by greenkozi Subscriber! | Permalink
  • @greenkozi, I wonder if the devs know how many glitchen they've been sleeping with?
    Posted 15 months ago by Varekai Subscriber! | Permalink
  • hmmmm what if we donate them to a shrine...
    Posted 15 months ago by Artilect Subscriber! | Permalink
  • What ever do they think of us all?? :)
    Posted 15 months ago by Fstra Subscriber! | Permalink
  • @fstra - I often wonder same.
    Posted 15 months ago by ArtOfHands RoboGirl Subscriber! | Permalink