Topic

A Little This and That (Feel free to contribute)

I remember we used to have a thread like this is FS. It was hilarious.

Scene 1 begins as camera focuses on several devs, surrounding an oak meeting table, and chuckling quietly to themselves. The wallpaper has pictures of all sorts of Glitchy things against a white background, with labels saying what they are. A Butterfly Milker decorates one wall, while a Piglet adorns another. The boss at the head of the table grins, and claps his hands several times to get the attention of his employees.

Stoot: *grinning smugly* So, have they received the rumor? About us opening on the 12th?
Kevbob: Yes boss. I bet right now, they're all at their computers, slack jawed and wide eyed, and going totally NUTS. They're so incredibly addicted now, so I bet we could get them to gift their cars to us for a week of Glitch *evil chuckle*
Stoot: So, when do you think we'll REALLY open? This is going to be so fun! *laughs evil laugh*
Kevbob: Let's keep em waiting for a few more days. I bet by Friday they'll be in need of counselling. 
Eric: Ok, but.... *clearly hesitating* Don't you think they'll come and get us once they realise that we are toying with them, while pushing out features that we already planned, done, and wrote the program for? 
Stoot: Nah, there's no way they'll figure out where we really are. They'll think we're either in Vancouver or San Francisco. There's no way they'll know we're really in LA.

*Alarm blares immediately*

Stoot: I guess I stand corrected.
Eric: Uhh..... I think it's them...... it looks like a mob of them middle aged ladies, and uh-oh....... I think they just took out one of our security guys........ And the potted plant..... and Beefcake, he must have sounded the alarm after seeing them on his trip to get coffee.......... and OH MY GIANT, MY CAR! A GROUP OF THEM JUST FLATTENED MY CAR!!!!!
Stoot: HIDE!!!!

*scene fades to black*

So, what do you think? I'll be posting sequels if you think this is cool.
ETA: The list of abbreviations have gotten pretty long. Here are several.
MALs: Middle Aged Ladies. Ongoing joke, brought over by FS, about how no one but middle aged ladies play the game. Or express violence when not being able to play. 
RU: Retractable Umbrella. One of the primary MAL weapons.
RUWMALs: Retractable Umbrella Wielding MALs. See above.
AFAP: As Fast as Possible. Like ASAP.
WT: Walkie Talkie.
ROFLMAOPIMP: Rolling on the floor laughing my ass off pissing in my pants (try saying that quickly, 3 times) . How our writers here hope you react to this thread. 
Cast
RM: Rascalmom. It's her initials. One of the leading ladies in the screenplays. Writes scenes, sometimes.
Mare: Full name Marebito. Also another leading lady.
KkC: Me. Also initials. Instigator of thread, and occasionally acts like a gator.
Many other people, probably way too long a list, who I'm extremely thankful for the support. And thanks for allowing us to use your names. 
Devs: Developers. List and positions here (credits to Lellie for that).

Posted 18 months ago by KitkatCat Subscriber! | Permalink

Replies

  • OMG!!  TY TY TY  This is too funny.  Liquid warning funny.  ROTFLMAOPIMP funny!!
    Posted 17 months ago by Marla Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Scene 9 –
    Jono is sitting with his head in his hands at a huge oval conference table which is covered with monitors and keyboards. The room is strangely quiet except for an occasional sob from Jono. He can still hear Rascalmom’s evil and slightly deranged laughter just before stoot’s phone went dead. He hears it over & over again. He hasn’t heard from Myles or the Angels in several hours and fears the worst. Suddenly, the doors burst open and there stands Serguie.
    Serguie: They’re gone!!!! The Angels are all gone!!! Captured by the Giants’ Safety Committee members; Hank Tudor, Joe Blow and Napabeth. And the needles, those knitting needles!!! It was horrible!!! *shaking head* So, so horrible!
    WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO JONO???!!!!!
    Jono *grabs Serguie and shakes him*: Get a hold of yourself man!
    Just then there is a crackle on the walkie-talkie.
    SugarQb *whispering* Is anyone there?? Please Oh Giants, please someone be there…
    Jono *jumps for the walkie-talkie* SugarQb, are you all right? Are you alone?
    SugarQb *sobbing slightly* Oh Jono, it’s horrible. tiny_may and I are in the air vents. No one knows we are here. Jono, we’ve heard terrible things, seen terrible things. They are out of control. We have to stop them!

    Meanwhile, in a room in another part of the bldg, there sits many of the devs surrounded by MALs who are holding their handbags & retractable umbrellas. The devs hands and feet bound by duct tape – kevbob, eric, Beefcake, Mart Lume, Kukubee, rayn, Pinot, KMurphy. In through the door walks Myles Angels – kakul, Pepper_Rose, Jade, Araldia and Lisa. There is a small mob of MALs roaming the halls in search of any other dev attempting a rescue. Stoot has been taken to another room to be interrogated.
    KitkatCat: We want access and we want it now!!!
    stoot *voice trembling*: I can’t do it. It’s not ready. We haven’t even written a haiku.
    KitkatCat: *softly whispering in his ear as she lightly strokes his cheek* Now stoot, you know we love you. We just want you to open just a little bit sooner than you wanted. We don’t want to hurt you but we MUST play. *KitkatCats eyes glaze over slightly as she continues* This can all be over with so fast. It just depends on you stoot. Just say yes.
    stoot *hangs his head and sobs lightly* I can’t… I can’t… I can’t…
    KitkatCat’s expression changes. She has a look of someone who is possessed.
    KitkatCat: Someone hand me a plank. Looks like we need some strong persuasion here.
    Suddenly, there is a multitude of planks being pulled out of handbags.
    *scene fades to black, a soft whimpering being heard in the background*
    Posted 17 months ago by Ruby Specklebottom Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Great work Ruby! ROFL, I'm actually a bit like that in RL. ROFL. Plank. ROFLMAO.
    Posted 17 months ago by KitkatCat Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Thanks KKC. You are a great inspiration and I was just trying to follow the story.

    If you really ARE like that in RL then I want you on my side :D lol
    Posted 17 months ago by Ruby Specklebottom Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Great stuff!! Great, great stuff! :D
    Posted 17 months ago by Marla Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Scene 10
    Location: MAL hideout in Glitch top secret HQ, LA.
    KITKATCAT, holding a plank aloft and frowning quizzically. It seems there's someone missing. 
    KkC: RM, is it just me, or is there a few people missing here? 
    RM (consults clipboard) : Hmm, Stoot's here, Kevbob's here, Eric's here, Beefcake's here, Mart Lume's here, Kukubee's here, rayn's here, jdawg's probalbly still in the fridge, and the Myles Angels – kakul, check, Pepper_Rose, check, Jade,check,  Araldia, check, Lisa, check........ I think we're missing several Myles Angels.......... Hey, who ARE we missing?
    Brib: Serguei's not here. But then, I don't think he was here in the beginning. Same with Jono, Endoplasmic, E-yon, Bees!, and Myles!. 
    KkC: What about the Myles Angels?
    Lelu: SugarQb. And tiny_may, I think. Wait..... annapee's not here either? That makes 3 Myles Angels.
    Brib: They could try and stage another rescue.
    RM: Ok then, RUWMALs, surround the GTSHQ (Glitch Top Secret HQ). Capture any other dev that attempts to free the prisoners. 
    Retractable Umbrella Wielding MALs (aka RUWMALs): Yes, RM!
    Lelu: You know, that plan we just foiled has a tinge of Crazy Russian in it. I bet Serguei came up with it.
    KkC: Well, we don't have time to lose. Every minute spent here is every minute that we could have being playing GLITCH with wasted.
    RM: Agreed! Now, Lelu, choose your torture device........... Feather Duster, Used Chamomile Teabag, Electric Toothbrush, Hair Straightener, Soup Ladle, Aromatherapy Candle, or the Good Old Dependable Vacuum Cleaner? 
    *Scene 10 ends as Lelu picks up a monstrous looking vacuum cleaner, while others pick up various household objects*
    Posted 17 months ago by KitkatCat Subscriber! | Permalink
  • (INT = INTERIOR)

    Scene 10.5
    (First, Reminds KKC that napabeth is with the bad boys team right now:)
    Jono and Serguei sit slumped at conference table. A walkie-talkie on the table plays a bit of static now and then.
    Suddenly, the door creaks open slowly.
    Marebito appears, high on rookswort. In her hands she carries the elusive construction tool.
    Marebito: Oh yes, you people thought I was forgotten. But you should've listened to Myles several scenes ago. (WHISPERS) I. Am. The. Real. Danger. I will not lose mood...no matter WHAT I do to you!
    Uncharacteristically, Serguei's eyes open wide. 
    Jono: Oh my giant. WHERE did you find the construction tool?
    Marebito: Don't you think the question should be, "What are you planning to do with the construction tool?"
    Serguei (quietly, aside): Oh please, let me go back to being a bodyless head in the Forest.
    Marebito (hearing him): That can be arranged.

    CUT TO:
    Hank, Joe Blow, napabeth, Lellie and a mass of others. Hank pulls out a cell phone and dials.
    Hank (into phone): Listen, jjbob, have you and Ebil seen jdawg? He's escaped us.
    (phone crackling)
    Hank: What do you mean, you're not paying attention? You guys are guarding the parking lot!
    (phone crackling)
    Hank: You're playing piggie toss with E-yon? E-yon's a dev, you guys! He evaded notice! Quick, get awa—  (to team) I lost him.
    napabeth: Okay, that's it. Let's lose some clothes here. 
    Lellie: Get out the SERIOUS handbags now, folks.
    Joe Blow: Oh yeah, it's ON now!
    The cougar/bad boy team hustles toward parking lot.

    CUT TO:
    A dark vent somewhere deep in Tiny Speck HQ. All we can see is a faint glow from a walkie-talkie "on" light.
    Tiny May (whispering, total Sixth Sense vibe here): I see be-rooked piggies....

    Fade out.
    Posted 17 months ago by RM Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Playing piggy toss with E-yon. LOL, totally wetting myself here RM. Btw, from the torture devices I listed above, what would you take? I'm taking Aromatherapy Candle. I've got a talent for arson.
    Posted 17 months ago by KitkatCat Subscriber! | Permalink
  • KKC, feather duster. Tickling has been used as a form of torture for many centuries... :D
    Posted 17 months ago by RM Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Scene 11
    Serguei and Jono are dragged by a construction tool carrying Marebito, into the MAL hideout. They shudder as they draw closer, being deafened by sounds of screaming, a vacuum cleaner roar, and hysterical screaming/ giggling as well as less hysterical, but equally chilling sounds of crazed, feminine laughter. They are also blinded by smoke that smelled like lavender, but not too much that they couldn't make out the feathers floating around.
    Mare: Well, looks like the girls got busy. *shouts over the whirr of the vacuum* Hey women! Look what I found barely half a kilometre away! Let me join in the fun!
    KkC: Mare, you came back just in time. So, what will it be? *gestures to table full of household objects*
    Mare: Nah, I'll just use my good old construction tool. Nice fire breathing show the by the way.
    KkC: Thanks. You should see RM with her feather duster. She's INCREDIBLE with it.
    Lelu: Well, he's strong. Still not breaking down and telling us where's the master switch. We better check on the cougars and the bad boys. 

    Cut to:
    *Mobile Phone rings*
    Hank: Oh, I think that's mine. Oh, it's from Lelu and the Extorters. (to phone) Jdawg somehow escaped the fridge. And apparently, E-yon's in the building as well. We're going after the both of them. No, haven't caught annapee, tiny_may or Sugar yet. Oh, Serguei and Jono, here already? See, I told you that sacrificing all the Rookswort was worth it. Yeah, will do. Over.
    Joe: Oh look, Ebil and jj ahead! 
    Napabeth: Ebil, where did E-yon go? 
    Ebil:*winces in pain, signs something*
    Napabeth: Oh, he kicked you in the- ouch......
    jjbob: Then he took off. We couldn't see him because he sprayed us with the fire extinguisher before running off. 
    Lellie: That explains the foam.
    *scene fades to black as the reunited team continue the hunt for the missing devs*
    Posted 17 months ago by KitkatCat Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Scene 11.5
    SugarQb and tiny_may keep absolutely still in the heating vent, until they are totally sure that they are out of the hearing range of the cougar/ bad boys team.
    tiny_may (whispering): Oh great. Another 2 captured.
    SugarQb: Yeah, but jdawg and E-yon- wait a minute, since when was E-yon even IN the building? 
    tiny_may: Oh, Myles! said he'd call for backup if anything goes wrong. I always thought by back up he meant everyone who are not already here. Looks like back-up is just E-yon.
    WT: Negative, tiny_may. There are other devs around as well. The MALs just haven't realised yet.
    SugarQb: Myles? You're not captured? 
    WT: Of course not. They still think I have nothing to do with it. Though that is strange. You guys ARE called Myle's Angels for a reason.........
    tiny_may: Think we've got trouble.... it looks like there's someone crawling towards us.....
    WT: Keep quiet and pretend you're not there.
    annapee: No need. It's just me. 
    SugarQb: Is it really you annapee? You sound wrong......
    Tiny_may and SugarQb scream as a mask is ripped off annapee/ Essie's face, and all of them tumble through a heating vent opening.
    WT: Hello? I heard screaming. Hello? *static cackle* Oh, boy.
    *scene fades to black*
    Posted 17 months ago by KitkatCat Subscriber! | Permalink
  • I am loving this .. great work, everyone:-) .. Even down to the rifts in the time/space continuum - totally rad in wonderful glitchy way and makes me not miss my purple junk so much!

    Of course once Mare sees this, she will whip you up a spreadsheet in no time so you will always know who is where, doing what to whom ....
    Posted 17 months ago by Lellie Subscriber! | Permalink
  • lol..... but are you sure it's Mare? I thought it was RM who's the detail obsessed one.
    Posted 17 months ago by KitkatCat Subscriber! | Permalink
  • ROFLMAOPIMP :O
    Posted 17 months ago by Twoodle Subscriber! | Permalink
  • These scenes are so fantastically funny,and now i find myself refreshing for the next installment,bravo!!..:))
    Posted 17 months ago by Joos Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Scene 12:  We move in to oversee this:
    Brib approaches RM:  Look!  I found a great weapon.  If we can find more of these we will be triumphant! 

    Brib whips out a duct taped black bird with a vicious beak:  See, it's a chicken with a mean beak.  They will surely Open when we threaten Stoot with this.

    RM:  Ah, Brib that is NOT a chicken, it's a ROOK! 

    In the distance faint cawing can be heard.  The call gets louder as several Rooks fly toward the MALs.

    Brib:  Oops!
    Posted 17 months ago by Brib Annie Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Introducing:

    Glitch Dog
    Currently feeling dejected. Due to current events underfed and decidedly underpetted. Worried someone will find out it has a glitch account and that Kukubee will remember that pig-suit wardrobe-file.
    Steven
    Abacus-playing happy-lad.
    Currently being queried by backers viz a viz cessation in spice flow and unable to reach anyone via usual electronic means.

    Will Glitch Dog get fed and petted?
    Will anyone find out it has a Glitch account?
    Will anyone find out why some "pigs" are un-nibbable?
    Unable to reach anyone, will Steven have to go walkabout in Glitch HQ?
    Will anyone ever find the source of the smell?
    Will Steven ever get more skills?
    Will the two join the forces and ultimately join the hunt for the elusive master switch?

    Find the answer [soon] to this and many other questions in the next instalment of ... This And That .. the contiiinuuuuing story ...
    Posted 17 months ago by Lellie Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Scene 13:

    Hab Nlab tiptoes in through a fire exit to the maintenance area of the supposedly secret Tiny Speck hideout after having isolated herself in her mad scientist laboratory for the past week inventing various evil devices and formulas to assist with the takeover while  xoxJulie, her trusty psychic sidekick has kept her aware of the progress made so far.  Hab chuckles quietly (yet in the most evil way ANYONE has ever heard, having been pushed to the brink of insanity due to an empty Glitchodone Clinic, unable to find The Divine One~ ).  xoxJulie activates the broccoli for increased psychic range.  "Yes", she says, "Myles' Angels are still on the loose and armored - they think they are safe, tucked away in the air ducts!", giggling excitedly and jumping despite Hab's warning to keep quiet.  Hab reaches into her cougar-rated bag, and gingerly, ever-so-carefully, pulls out a strange-looking concoction stored in a Seal-A-Meal storage container, while chain-smoking her hand-rolled, Glitchodone/purple flower/nutmeg/clove cigarettes.  "Hoopdeloop!"  xoxJulie says, getting a whiff of the second-hand smoke, "That is some seriously crazy sh*t you are smoking, girl!"  Hab smiles in a bone-chilling way, her eyes rolling and face spasming in a way that worries xoxJulie for a split second.  Of course, Jule thinks to herself, her buddy Habbie is really always at her best when completely mental.  Hab takes her tinkertool out and opens the container, backing away from the greenish-purplish gas that billows out, getting sucked right into the air conditioning system, precisely as she had planned.  "Well?", xoxJulie says, getting immediately impatient as usual, jumping, jumping, jumping.  "Wait for it...", Hab says with her evil smile widening just a touch.  And then....  they hear it....  sounds of screaming, and cracking, and a strange metallic/glass crumbling sound.  Jule activates another broccoli and giggles.  "Yes!  It's working, Hab!  Your glitch-metal disruption, fear gas mix!  You did it, girl!  Those angels are armor-less and terrified beyond belief!  They're not saving CRAP!  They are rook-bait for sure!  Ha ha ha ah ha ha!!!"  xoxJulie falls on the ground laughing as Hab smiles and nods in a satisfied manner - her week of pain and Glitch withdrawal has not been in vain, and only fueled her evil genius-inventor streak.  Her eye spasms as she plans her next move to assist in the takeover of Tiny Speck. 
    Posted 17 months ago by Hab Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Location: In a room in another part of HQ
    Cast:: Essie (sc), Holly (me), SugarQb, Tiny_may, Pinot, Kevin Murphy, and maybe others hiding in the shadows

    Holly: Well done essie, I was beginning to think I was the only one working on the real heart of the problem here with Kevin and Pinot. Put them in the chairs over there.
    Essie: Will do Holly.
    *Holly turns to grab her focusing orb and set it to radiate*
    Ok now you devs FOCUS!!!!! You need to write a haiku and soon. You need to be ready to open for all us MAL's at a moments notice don't you know, so write some extra haikus now so this won't happen again.
    *suddenly Holly and Essie turn to each other as music starts to filter into the room*
    Essie: Holly did you hear that? I think I will go investigate. It sounds like Hank is here and I'm not sure that that isn't going to distract the devs rather than encourage them. You know those stories about all the EOT (end of test) parties. Be right back.
    Holly: Thanks Essie. I have my electric toothbrush right here if they try anything tricky.
    *Essie leaves as the strains of Who Let the Dogs Out and Electric Avenue continue to get louder*
     
    Posted 17 months ago by Holly Waterfall Subscriber! | Permalink
  • To continue the story, I thought we should leave some of the TS people uncaptured. After all, every good story has a little twist here and there.

    Scene 14 –
    In a storage closet far from MALs HQ stands a very frightened jdawg. The events of the day keep running through his head. So many of his friends caught or missing. Himself, locked in a refrigerator and half frozen. How did this happen? Why did this happen? We were only trying to make a better world. Don’t they realize we need time to do that? This shouldn’t have happened.
    Just then he hears a slight noise outside the door. The noise stops. He can see the shadow of someone standing at the door. His breathing quickens as he fears he too will be lost to the madness of the MALs and the Cougar boys. Suddenly, the door opens and there stands E-yon.

    E-yon: jdawg!!!!! I am so glad I found you!
    jdawg: E-yon!!! Quick! Get in here and shut the door.
    E-yon: I knew this would happen. I tried to tell stoot not to mess with those MALs but he wouldn’t listen. We had them hooked. All we had to do was give them a weekly dose of Glitch but stoot decided to try ‘something different’ this time. Look at what’s happened! *his shoulders slump over, completely defeated*
    jdawg: E-yon! There is no time for this. We must figure out how to get out of this mess. I fear the longer we wait the more members they can recruit to help them. Soon we will not be able to stop them.
    E-yon: Stop them?! Are you mad?! There is no stopping them! *grabs jdawg’s shirt & shakes him* Listen, I know stoot gave you the location of the secret button. You have to push the button and stop this madness!

    Suddenly, there is a loud noise outside the door.
    *crash pow whack whap zap zowie clunk kapow* Silence ….
    jdawg slowly opens the closet door. There, laying on the floor, is sc (Essie) – knocked out cold. Standing over her are SugarQb and tiny_may.

    SugarQb: HUH!!! Take that! We’re not ready to give up yet! *turns to tiny_may* Way to go girl!
    tiny_may: You too SugarQb. We must be careful now. They are going to disguise themselves to try and catch us. We have to be on guard.

    jdawg swings open the closet door, a big smile on his face.
    jdawg: SugarQb!! tinymay!! Thank the Giants you haven’t been caught!!
    SugarQb: jdawg!! E-yon!!! So good to see you. I feared only tiny_may and I were left to fight these malcontents.
    jdawg: *senses the approach of the MALs roaming the halls* Come on, let’s get away from here before we are discovered. I know of a triple super secret location where we can plot a rescue and take back our HQs.
    *the band of re-united devs races down the hall as the scene fades to black*
    Posted 17 months ago by Ruby Specklebottom Subscriber! | Permalink
  • well done Ruby!!!
    Posted 17 months ago by Piece of Serenity Subscriber! | Permalink
  • The now escaped devs race toward the magic button that would open Glitch. They know it is only a matter of time before the MALs, the bad boys and the cougars also find the switch. Suddenly, Glitch Dog zooms into the hallway, whining and clearly wanting to say something important, a la Lassie and Timmy in the well. 

    jdawg: What is it, boy?
    Glitch Dog: (whine whine whiiiiiiiiine whine)
    E-yon: He's trying to tell us something, jdawg. I fear the worst.
    Tiny May gives Glitch Dog a treat while SugarQb puts a sweet doggie hankie she just created around his neck.
    jdawg: We better follow him. He seems to want to head toward the master switch anyway. Oh my giant, they might have found it!

    The team races down the hall, led by the valiant Glitch Dog, barking like a maniac. As they skid around the corner, they see a frightening tableau:
    Marebito, at the head of the pack, clearly fueled by Hab Nlab and xoxJulie's purple hookah fumes, is hovering over a cowering, hog-tied pack of devs, construction tool in hand. The naked except for hat and shoes Rascalmom is standing with her finger poised over the master switch. The MALs, cougars and bad boys have their various weapons pointed at the devs...encircled, the devs seem to be whimpering. Their imploring eyes find the rescue team. Hank's music is getting more menacing in the background, as he has put on some metal for Aniloverl and RM. 

    Somewhere, a chicken squawks, only to be immediately silenced.

    jdawg: All right, this has gone far enough! First of all, haikus do NOT have to rhyme. Secondly, muahahahahah, we can do whatever we like. And finally, I will sic Glitch Dog on you if you don't stand aside.

    sc803: Ah, but we greatly outnumber you, jdawg.

    E-yon: At least let stoot speak to us before you attack.

    Lellie looks skeptical but takes the duct tape off stoot's mouth.

    stoot: Guys...guys...let RM press the button.

    Everyone gasps in surprise. 

    jdawg: Boss, are you SURE?

    stoot gives jdawg a meaningful look.

    RM: We have triumphed! Bwahahahaha!
    She pushes the button. Nothing happens.

    RM: Hey! What???

    stoot (to other devs): Come on, how could you forget the DNA encoding I put on the master switch? (to RM) Only one of US can press that switch. (in a semi-evil mad scientist genius voice) Never underestimate the power of the giants!

    RM: Ah, stoot, but you have only delayed us. glum, get your scraper and bring Steven forward! Aha! We DID have him! None of you knew! 

    glum pudding threatens Steven with her barnacle scraper. He whimpers, moves forward...and reaches out to the button. But what is this? His eyes show a spark of triumph!

    RM (seeing the look in Steven's eyes): NOOOOO! Wait!

    She's too late. Steven presses the button and suddenly...all the devs vanish in a weird time warp flipping window (as in science fiction show the chronicler can suddenly not recall*). 

    SOUND EFFECTS: WOOP WOOP WOOP

    The mad Glitchers stand in stunned silence. RM begins to weep quietly. A small chicken feather flutters to the floor.

    INT. REAL GLITCH HQ, VANCOUVER.
    The weird sci-fi window appears from thin air. The devs step out.

    stoot: Thank Cosma I put that emergency metraplon defrackulating shermbop in the master switch. Steven was the only one I told. New guy's privilege!

    All devs: (wild relieved laughter)

    Jono: We shoulda trusted you, stoot. (looking at a sobbing Kukubee, Lisa shaking like a leaf and Myles rocking back and forth in terror) But I think some of us are gonna need post-traumatic stress counseling, Captain.

    A light appears near the ceiling... The DIVINE~ one descends on her trusty horse Lightning. Fear returns to Glitch HQ.

    What will happen next? Will the mad Glitchers give up? What does Divine~ have up her sleeve? Will the devs ever reveal what the dickens the construction tool actually does? Will Glitch Dog finally be able to return to sleeping? What role does the rook really play? And WHERE is annapee? Only time will tell...in the next installment of THIS AND THAT....

    (*ETA: Hank tells me this is from Superman, the Phantom Zone.)
    Posted 17 months ago by RM Subscriber! | Permalink
  • ROFLMAOPIMP!  Thank Giants I changed my name from MiddleAged to MisAdventure!  Thanks for so many laughs all of you creative writers.
    Posted 17 months ago by MisAdventure Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Somewhere, a chicken squawks, only to be immediately silenced.

    LOL!
    Posted 17 months ago by Lilith Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Great chapter RM! You left soooo many possibilities open.
    *puts on thinking cap* This could be dangerous - Divine with the devs ....hmmmmm ...
    Posted 17 months ago by Ruby Specklebottom Subscriber! | Permalink
  • OH. MY. GIANTS.  RM, you surely have outdone yourself!!!  I was crying from the laughter!!!  What a bunch of creative little cuckoo birds (or rooks? nah - too destructive) we all are!  Must be one of the reasons we love this crazy game so much!  

    Side Note:

    Hab sits quietly, meditating positive energy toward The Divine~ One, hoping beyond hope that She may be THE ONE.  She jumps up, remembering The Magnificaprojectionator - a device she had half-given up on, that if successful would magnify and project thoughts to a place or person of one's choosing.  "Yes!", she thinks excitedly, "If I can get this piece of guano to work, it might be just the thing that could elevate The Divine~ One's powers to the next level!  And then... (laughing evilly to self) we would have THE ULTIMATE POWER!!!"  Hab pauses thoughtfully.  "Unless...  The Divine~ One is pulled in and captured by Cosma who would be attuned immediately to someone with that level of mental power, and might try to harness it to elevate herself above the other Giants.  Oh dear.  "Haven't you figured something out yet, Hab?", xoxJulie yells down from the top of the 30 foot ceiling of the lab, amusing herself by activating spinach and changing all the lightbulbs in Hab's immense lab/evil lair.  "It's complicated, Jule!", Hab yells back.  "Why can't we just take the tank?!", xoxJulie yells down.  Hab smiles and chuckles, always appreciative of her buddy's enthusiasm and encouragement.  "As much fun as total annihilation is, we don't want to completely destroy them, just get the game back on, remember?", Hab answers patiently.  "Awww!  You promised you'd let me drive the tank after the last weapons mod!", xoxJulie calls down.  "I know, I know!", Hab answers "We just have to wait until it is the right time!  Now come down from there and help me work on this thing!  It may be our only hope!".  Hab goes back to thinking, brow furrowed, puffing furiously on her designer drug (designed by herself of course) smokes.  She squints up at the purple smoke rising, and thinks:  "I have GOT to raise the Glitchodone level in the next batch!".
    Posted 17 months ago by Hab Subscriber! | Permalink
  • *puts on appropriate music for the upcoming battle, picturing The Divine~ One as The Queen Of Light from the song/battle*
    Posted 17 months ago by Hab Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Scene 16 with annapee looking in horror as her colleagues disappear into a weird sci-fi/ teleporting window. She silently curses herself for not joining them and staying hidden. 

    Sound effect: Scary Sounding Organ

    Annapee: Now, to escape this mad house......... I wonder whether they have noticed that I'm not there............

    Meanwhile, in Glitch HQ Vancouver......
    Divine~ fizzles out. The devs sigh in relief as they figure out that it is only a hologram.
    Myles: Excellent, you have made it back. 
    Stoot: I want to make sure there's no one missing.
    Eric pulls out a clipboard.
    Eric: Hmm, Boss, Kevbob, me, Serguei.... (rattles off all of the devs names until......) OH SH*T where's annapee?
    jdawg: *facepalm*
    Rest of TS team squabble. Stoot claps his hands.
    Stoot: Quiet team! Annapee is stuck there. LET THEM KNOW THAT WE NEVER LEAVE  A (wo)MAN BEHIND!
    Rest of team: YEAH!
    Serguei: But first, you need a plan.......
    Myles: Serguei, remember whose plan was it the last time? 
    To be continued........
    Posted 17 months ago by KitkatCat Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Btw, thanks RM. THAT was awesome(ly hilarious).
    Posted 17 months ago by KitkatCat Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Aw, thanks, KKC :)
    Posted 17 months ago by RM Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Hmm..... should I, or should I not.......... Oh yeah I should!

    Scene 16.5
    The devs gear up. Kakul puts on a priestess costume and brings a meditative orb. Stoot and several others put on full armour. SugarQb, tiny_may, Jade and Lisa put on cat suits straight out of the set of Cat Woman. Kevbob puts on a chicken suit, though no one really knows why. Myles dresses up in a James Bond tux. Steven, Serguei and Endoplasmic have on full Rook Fighter costumes. They board the TS supersonic jet (TS has a supersonic jet?) and head straight for THE HIDEOUT.

    Cut to:
    Brib plays with the Rook. Or rather, torments the rook (didn't she learn her lesson from the last time when she had to run indoors with RM to escape all those Rooks?). She has locked the poor bird in a glass tank, and is taunting it with a Piggy. It's eyes are wild. All a sudden, it lets out a hellish screech. Glass shatters as a flock of a thousand CROWS fly in. When the dust clears, all that remains is a shattered glass tank and an empty chair. RM enters.
    RM: Bribling, we need you. Brib? 
    RM spots shattered glass tank and chair.
    RM: Oh, crap.

    Voiceover(Narrator, aka Me): Will the devs succeed? Will Brib ever be seen again? Where did the Rook go? Find out NEXT TIME, on A LITTLE THIS AND THAT! 
    Posted 17 months ago by KitkatCat Subscriber! | Permalink
  • KKC - That was a great way to end chapter 1.
    The next chapter should be very interesting ;)
    Posted 17 months ago by Ruby Specklebottom Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Yeah, why not have about 16 scenes per chapter? Label it as Chapter 2. (number) in your next post.
    Posted 17 months ago by KitkatCat Subscriber! | Permalink
  • A dog house in a backyard, Glitch Dog lies in kennel with laptop.

    Glitch dog:(pushes refresh) Come on come on... OPEN! Dang it!
    Vicky: (from back door) Where on earth has my bloody laptop gone? (slightly crazed) Glitch might me open!!!
    Glitch dog: (chuckling)When will she learn? Its MY laptop, I just let her use it!
    Glitch Dog: (muttering to himself) Dang it! The devs haven't opened yet! After all the help I gave them! (growls) Well maybe I will just have to help the MALs next time... with out telling the devs I have changed side..of course!

    Scene Fads to black.

    Voice over:What side will Glitch Dog choose? Will he make a successful secret agent? Will Vicky find her laptop? And could somebody please get Glitch Dog a translator collar? We can't all speak dog!

     
    Posted 17 months ago by VickyAlice139 Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Heeelp!  Chickens, why does it have to be Chickens?
    Posted 17 months ago by Brib Annie Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Chapter 2.2
    Location: Desolation Peak, the summit of Rook Wood Mountain.
    A swarm of Rooks fly over. Brib is tossed roughly onto the hard ground. The crushers fly towards her, only to be stopped by a wing/ hand gesture that The Rook makes. 
    The Rook: Well, well, what have we got here? It's a Glitch! *face changes from smug to to vengeful* You guys have been smashing my eggs since forever............... HOW WOULD YOU LIKE IT IF I, THE ROOK, TAKE MY REVENGE AND SMASH YOU!
    Brib: Well, your crushers hit us, hard! And you just sent over an attack barely a week ago!
    The Rook: The crushers are there to defend my eggs. It's you guys that somehow get through them and smash my eggs! *silently* And if you think that's an attack, you haven't seen nothing yet........ 
    Brib: We can beat you. Just send those Rooks over, we can kick their *** to next Hairday!
    The Rook: Whatever! We like causing chaos. But, with no-one in the world, even if we cause chaos, no one will see it!
    Brib: Oh yeah. Didn't you know? The devs shut down the game periodically. We're pretty miserable not being able to play as well. The rumour is that the opening is-
    The Rook: 12th. I know. But I will wait. 
    Brib: Well, I can't! We went and terrorized the devs, but they escaped! 
    The Rook: Really? LEMME AT 'EM!
    Brib: Ok, so, if they open it, you get to attack us, and we get to play! 
    The Rook: It's win-win!
    Brib and The Rook: LET ME AT 'EM!
    *scene ends as Brib is escorted back to MAL hideout with The Rook and her foot soldiers*
    Posted 17 months ago by KitkatCat Subscriber! | Permalink
  • LMAO at both the fact that Glitch Dog can talk and the rooks teaming up with Brib! I suspect I may not be able to contribute any more for several hours (my few sleep hours, morning with sonny boy, then work). Will be curious to see where it all goes in the meantime...but oh, I WILL be back:)
    Posted 17 months ago by RM Subscriber! | Permalink
  • I'm working on the new chapter but even little glitchens need to sleep.
    I will be dreaming of the wonderful world of Glitch and expect to wake up with a wonderful story. Or, I will wake up to read the next chapter/scene in the saga that is "A Little This and That". :)
    Posted 17 months ago by Ruby Specklebottom Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Ok, am bored to tears so must calm myself with a bit of writing of the creative sort.
    (Is this a screenplay or a novel? Guess it's both. Enter the next scene. ACTION!)

    Chapter 2, Scene 3
    The devs, dressed in their various armours/ catsuits/ whatever, creep forward, hoping to sneakily infiltrate the hideout. They approach from all directions. Seeing movement from the corner of his eye, E-yon jumps. A rat scuttles off.
    E-yon: What was that?
    jdawg: Relax! It's just a rat! Jeez, dude, you're scaring me. From the minute we got on the jet till now, you have been twitching at every little sound. 
    E-yon: *mutters* I just can't get over the feeling that we're being watched........
    The camera zooms into a tree in the foreground. Out of sight of the devs, the rat transforms into the Divine One. She peers out at the devs, who still haven't noticed her.
    Divine: Yes, my dear E-yon, you are being watched alright........

    She continues, mostly to herself.

    Divine: I must admit, pretending to be a hologram was one of my most brilliant ideas. Now, everyone but that nervous wreck E-yon had let their guard down. 

    She continues, softer, but in a crazier tone.

    Divine: They shall not mess with the Divine One! I have special powers, Cosma granted them to me herself.............. *Crazed laughter* (Cue thunderbolt and storm clouds)

    Cut to: 

    Stoot, Myles!, Jono and Serguei are on the jet, as Mission Control. Jono has hacked into the CCTV system of the LA TSGHQ(contrary to popular belief, TS in this case does not stand for Tiny Speck.  It stands for Top Secret), and is monitoring the whole place. He also hacks into the CCTV centre of the HQ to make the screens there play a repeating 1 minute clip of the whole place, so that it shows a falsely peaceful HQ. The Mission Control team grin as they see the Myles Angels (without annapee) dashing in without interference. The RUWMALs guarding the main doors of the place are now unconscious. Serguei spots the Extorters heading towards a cross junction that the Angels are heading to.

    Serguei, into WT: Angels, Extorters heading to cross junction. Hide. 
    WT (Jade): Ok, thanks Serguei. C'mon girls, into this store roo-ARGHH!

    Cut to:
    Eric, kevbob and Mart Lume creep through the facility, aided by a WT, the Mission Control and the HQ's hijacked CCTV system. They freeze, and hide when they come upon Brib, the Extorters, The Rook and her minions, and the Myles Angels, whose members are stuck in what looks like a fished-shaped origami box. 
    Marebito: Ha! Take that, you mean devs who still won't let us go on. 
    RM: Yes, open the game, or we'll have to do it ourselves.
    KkC: I swear, I'm going to snap that WE'RE CURRENTLY CLOSED sign into half the next time I see it.
    Brib: Now now, no need to be hasty. Remember when you said you were going to sue BFG for taking FS off?
    KkC: That reminds me. I still haven't sued them yet. Off to find my lawyers..........
    RM: KC, listen to me. One thing at a time. Right now, let's focus on getting the game open. THEN we'll go and sue BFG.
    KkC: Ok, sure. Let's do it.
    Mare: So...... what's it gonna be, ladies? Before you make your choice, I will remind you that we are not called The Extorters for nothing.

    The Myles Angels blink nervously.

    Cut to:
    Ebil and Hank, who are on CCTV duty, notice something odd. What's odd was that everyone in the building keep doing the same thing, over, and over, again! They were puzzled. They decide the write it off as a malfunction.

    To be continued.......
    Posted 17 months ago by KitkatCat Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Just found this. Looks like the MALs got to them after all.
    Posted 17 months ago by KitkatCat Subscriber! | Permalink
  • *collects boxtops*
    *fills out entry form*

    *licks stamps*
    *trots off to postbox*
    *feeds postbox*
    *hugs postbox and leaves a vegan granola bar for the frog*

    I hope they get my entry for  "Win A Walk-On in A Little This And That!" in time... *rubs belly* that was a LOT of SooperFrootySugaredGlitchyPuffs!
    Posted 17 months ago by Jennyanydots Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Scene 4 (edited since I forgot scene 3 already done)

    RM, KKC, Marebito, and Brib are in a deep discussion over how to make the Angels give them the secret code that will turn on the game.
    Brib: I still think the Rook and my minions can get the code out of them. *evil laugh* heh heh heh
    RM: I thought we decided that Hank was going to play his music until they became quivering mindless zombies willing to do anything to make it stop.
    KKC: That won’t work RM. Everyone likes Hank’s music. They will just be partying to the music. I know, let’s sue them for emotional distress!
    Mare: *glassy eyed from too much Rookswort, caresses her enhanced construction tool* I have something special in mind for them. *evil grin*
    All the extorters stare at Mare.
    In unison: Yeah, All Right, Good with me, Ok, Uh Huh, Let’s do it!

    Meanwhile, deep inside the fish-shaped origami box, the Angels are plotting their escape.
    Pepper_Rose: All right ladies, we have to find a way out of this box. Do any of you have any ideas?
    Jade: *tears well in her eyes* How could this happen?! I was one of them! I wanted to help them and look what they have done. *Sobbing*

    The Angels activate their emotional bears giving Jade hugs and kisses.
    SugarQb: It’s ok Jade. We’ll get out of this. The extractors forgot to check for weapons before imprisoning us. Look, I still have my Decibel Blasting Bubble Tuner. Let me tell you, it wasn’t easy to hide this in this catwoman outfit either! Anyway, one little blow on this puppy and BANG! our prison explodes.
    Lisa: But what will happen to us if you blow it??
    kakul: I got it!

    Reaching into her pocket she pulls out earplugs.
    kakul: I made these plugs to block the effects of the new orb I was working on. I call it a Transcendelator Maxis. It can radiate a meditative aura 100 times stronger than a plain orb. Anyone within range will immediately be put in a deep stupor. The effects will last for only 15 minutes so we will have to move fast. I made the ear plugs to protect us from the sound but I think they will work for the Decibel Blasting Bubble Tuner as well. *she hands out special ear pieces to everyone*
    Lisa: But what about the Rook? You know we’ll be ripped to pieces as soon as we break out of our fish prison.

    The normally quiet tiny_may reaches into her pocket. She has what looks to be a small thin rope made of some shiny material.
    tiny_may: This should stop the Rook. *waves the shiny rope in the air* By playing with the Alchemy Tongs, the Smelter and the Hog-tie rope, I discovered this super strong rope – Tincopdenum Tie. I just know Humbaba and Zille help me discover this.

    Araldia: And I brought something a little special with me. *she pulls out a fry pan*
    SugarQb: That looks like an ordinary fry pan.
    Araldia: Yep! Sure is!
    Lisa: How is that going to help?
    Araldia: *smirky grin on her face* Have you ever seen how I USE a fry pan?

    All the Angels smile. It's war they want, it's war they get!!!
    Posted 17 months ago by Ruby Specklebottom Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Ruby, marvelous stuff!

    @Jennyanydots: When I have time to add a chapter, baby, you're IN! LOL Such a huge cast in Glitch and of course our brains shoot right to who we probably talk to most. 

    Also, who turned Divine~ into a hologram? :) LOL, I wanted her to actually be there...hmm, I'll have to work that back in, I can see.
    Posted 17 months ago by RM Subscriber! | Permalink
  • @RM: What about me can I have a part? I am quite handy with an vacuum cleaner!
    Posted 17 months ago by VickyAlice139 Subscriber! | Permalink
  • can these stories, hilarious btw, involve some real life dev jumping?

    i mean .. if they are captive ..

    hburger's dev-jumping video ..

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pmFtP1wxdW0
    Posted 17 months ago by striatic Subscriber! | Permalink
  • LOL, good idea, striatic. And of course, VickyAlice:) 

    Dang, my job better be quiet today as I can sense some seriously silly writing coming on...
    This thread has been a hoot, thanks to KitkatCat for starting this little creative lunacy:)
    Posted 17 months ago by RM Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Haven't read the latest of your postings...but you guys have written in the new guy already, right? :whistle:
    Posted 17 months ago by b3achy Subscriber! | Permalink
  • LOL, b3achy, he was announced...what? A couple hours ago? :D Plus so far I don't see him with his Glitchy avatar and name yet (obviously we can use Keita for now). If things ever pipe down for me...we'll see what we can do:)
    Posted 17 months ago by RM Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Lol, she's not a hologram, she just pretended to be a hologram. Seems Divine~ had gotten some special powers from Cosma. She can transform herself into anything at all, but there is more to come......................
    @RM: You're welcome. It's a break for me too.
    Posted 17 months ago by KitkatCat Subscriber! | Permalink
  • The new Dev is "kt".  Check the bottom of my Friends list if you haven't added him yet.
    Posted 17 months ago by Brib Annie Subscriber! | Permalink