Topic

Powder of Startling Toxicity

A nice addition to the Alchemical Powders (and to the Inventory of Gardening Vendors) would be Powder of Startling Toxicity.

Simply put, this amped up version of Tree Poison that will destroy every Tree IN YOUR OWN YARD.

It won't work in public streets, or in other people's back yards. Only the owner of the house is able to deploy this highly toxic concoction.

Why would anyone even want this? Well, if you have ever moved into a previously occupied house and the trees growing there are not the trees you want to grow, you are faced with going through the process of killing each and every single tree individually, administering the poison, having to sit by as the helpless tree screams out for antidote. Once you have killed the first tree you get to move on to the next tree and do it all again. And depending on how many patches you have, maybe again and again.

So Powder of Startling Toxicity is a faster, perhaps slightly less painful way of clearing out the backyard of a new house, or for when your needs change and your current trees must go. I'm sure TS would come up for a slightly more over the top comic-tragic animation for the slaughter of multiple trees at once but in the end it would save time (the guilt buff would still happen but it wouldn't matter since you wouldn't need to poison any other trees in your yard) and hopefully lessen the distress that many Glitchen feel every and every time they pop the cork of that little brown bottle of Death.

Posted 15 months ago by The Cat Face Subscriber! | Permalink

Replies

  • I feel so guilty when I do in one tree...  Now to kill a whole forest...

    I can imagine transforming into a dalek being forced to shout exterminate! for 60 seconds because of my evil tree-slaughtering not-niceness and meanity.

    Come to the Dark Side - we have Wood Trees.

    ~~TJ Fuzzybutt
    Posted 15 months ago by Thaddeus J Fuzzybut Subscriber! | Permalink
  • If it's for your own yard, there's no guilt buff and no mood loss when you poison/kill trees (but you do get a mood boost for antidoting them).  While it might be a pain to buy however many poisons it takes to kill of your own yard (this coming from someone who's killed her yard hundreds of times over??), you can apply poison to one tree, move on to the next and poison, move on... until all the trees are poisoned.  Then when the first one dies, chop it down by which time the next should be dead, etc. etc.  While it's an interesting idea, it also makes things like Paul Bunions much easier (and it's not hugely difficult so much as time consuming and tedious).
    Posted 15 months ago by Marebito Subscriber! | Permalink
  • haha TJF! Great idea - Powder of Startling Toxicity briefly transforms the user into a crazed Rook cubimal!
    Posted 15 months ago by The Cat Face Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Marebito you're right - I'd forgotten that it worked differently in one's own yard vs. streets. Oh well - I'd still like to see people using this (or Tree Poison) briefly transformed into Rook Cubimals. :-)
    Posted 15 months ago by The Cat Face Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Well, I had three in my yard, my own little forest of Spice Trees...

     /sniff. 

    They trusted me implicitly.  I viciously poisoned them, murdered them in cold sap just for a few measly experience points and a completed quest.

    The last two had to know it was coming, with the first one going slowly like that. Oh the Sylvanity!  I couldn't shut out all the screaming "Help I have been poisoned and will die in 57 seconds." 

    I quickly wiped the sap from my hands cleared the stumps and donated the empty bottles and planks to Cosma.  She was less than thrilled but accepted my plea for forgiveness.

    After that I went on a spree wantonly poisoning old-growth bean plants with no care at all for the Jethimadh Spotted Tree Ghost habitat for - well, simply for badges... (badges we don' need no...) wrong story.

    I was stopped only by the EOTW.  I shudder to think of the consequences had I been allowed to continue unchecked. 

    Glitchen are the Superior Beings! Defoliate!  Defoliate!

    So The Cat Face, you would take away the single poison and in its stead give the curse of fatal death! 

    In place of the dark Rook you would have a Fuzzybutt, not dark but terrible and beautiful as the dawn, treacherous as the Juju, stronger than a High Class Hoe, all shall love me and despair!

    Ahhh hahaha The Cat Face, I pass the test.  I shall diminish and go into Animal Husbandry and remain...*

    ~~TJ Fuzzybutt

    * veni, vidi, risi...       (with no apologies to anyone,) "I came, I saw, I laughed..." 
    Posted 15 months ago by Thaddeus J Fuzzybut Subscriber! | Permalink
  • +1 TJF for your tiny Shakespearean tragedy. A great read. :)
    Posted 15 months ago by Voluptua Sneezelips Subscriber! | Permalink
  • TJF - I have to agree with Voluptua - and now I can't get the Dalek voice screaming "Defoliate! Defoliate" out of my head.
    Posted 15 months ago by The Cat Face Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Ah! I finally figured out where I'd heard some of those last lines TJF (why hello Mr Lord, what lovely rings you have there). I agree with the others, a very amusing read.

    As for the idea itself, I couldn't even bring myself to kill one tree :P I had wood trees growing at my house and was intending to chop them down and grow something else... But I just kept watering and petting them and couldn't let myself harvest them too low D: Thankfully the reset solved that problem for me.

    Still, I guess it would be useful if you were regularly clearing the trees in your yard.
    Posted 15 months ago by Serilyn Subscriber! | Permalink