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#### What "friends" see when they add you...

I'm curious if I'm the only one who doesn't enjoy the fact that when someone you don't know adds you... all of a sudden they can see where you are at every minute. In my opinion, they should only be able to if its a mutual add. Anyone else bothered by such a small thing?

Posted 12 months ago by Kissme Nao | Permalink

### Replies

- They can see where you are even if they are not friends by going to your profile page. A friend can invite you to IM even if you are in a completely different part of the world, but you do not have to accept.
  Posted 12 months ago by Kookaburra | Permalink
- I've always been a little bothered by this--it's also the reason why I add every single person as a friend that adds me: why give them the ability to see my updates on their profile page, but not give myself the same ability with them? Doesn't really make sense. I'm not too worried about it though: the Glitch community is generally totally awesome, and if I ever do have a problem with a single person (which I haven't yet), there is the option to block them.
  Posted 12 months ago by Shepherdmoon | Permalink
- Kissme Nao - As has been said before, friending someone in Glitch is really more like following someone on Twitter than like friending them on Facebook. That's just the way it is - it has its plus sides and its minuses. It lets me keep track of some interesting Glitchen (including stoot and other staff) with whom I don't have a personal relationship. I'm not stalking them; it's just interesting to see what they are doing and to read their updates.
  And remember, other players can not, as you suggested, "see where you are at every minute" - they can only see where, in an imaginary virtual world, your imaginary virtual avatar is. If someone is genuinely stalking you in game or otherwise being a jerk, then block them.
  But I think, from your post, that it's just the idea that someone could keep track of your Glitch if they wanted to that bothers you a little. That's just the way it is. I seriously doubt that anyone is wasting their time checking regularly to see what I am up to in game, and I wouldn't really give a hoot if they did.
  Posted 12 months ago by Hawkwell | Permalink
- If someone is genuinely stalking you in game, do take the time to let staff know by filing an Abuse Report.
  Posted 12 months ago by WindBorn | Permalink
- This raises a larger issue of increased privacy settings. There's a thread in ideas about it, that (despite the somewhat alarming language) raises some great points. Please check it out!
  Posted 12 months ago by Xev | Permalink
- I have no problem if people know where I am at in the game. Its not like it's real life. Nor have I ever been glitch stalked by anyone either.
  Posted 12 months ago by Popcorn☺ | Permalink
- I guess it really doesn't bother me unless I have put the person on block for a good reason. And I have not been glitchen stalked either. Would I like better privacy options? Yes would be nice!
  Posted 12 months ago by Casombra Amberrose | Permalink
- If you've blocked someone, they won't see your updates, much like they won't see a notice when you enter or leave a street.
  Posted 12 months ago by Magic Monkey | Permalink
- don't bother me
  Posted 12 months ago by Chanteusse | Permalink
- It would be nice if profiles and current location could be made private.
  Sometimes I add people as friends and they don't reciprocate. That's fine. But then I forget or don't keep track of which ones haven't reciprocated and I sometimes send multiple party invites to people who have not added me for one reason or another. Its a bit of a pain to go check to see if, after a few weeks, I haven't been added. I don't really want to bug people who aren't interested so after a few weeks (months or whenever I get around to it) I remove people who haven't reciprocated or otherwise shown any interest.
  Posted 12 months ago by Treesa | Permalink
- Its not a huge big deal, and i haven't been stalked or anything... but I guess I would just like the OPTION to either be a bit more private or share everything... *shrugs*
  Posted 12 months ago by Kissme Nao | Permalink
- There should be a middle ground between blocking and not blocking. Blocking is pretty absolute and harsh, (and it's very tough to undo unless you keep a list somewhere of all the users you've blocked - and also know whether or not they've changed their username).
  It's not awesome that people who want to be more selective when it comes to what people see are given the option of "well, block that person if you don't want them to know where you are."
  So, player x friends me, and my only option is to block them if I don't want them to get my updates? Seems like major overkill.
  Posted 12 months ago by Xev | Permalink
- There is a middle ground:
  Block them, and then immediately unblock them.
  It removes you from their friend list, and if they have more than 5 or 10 friends, they aren't likely to even notice that you are gone.
  Posted 12 months ago by WindBorn | Permalink
- That might work on other networks but in glitch I think they will notice. If you have just added someone and you are insta-blocked you'll see it in the list of friends online (which is comparatively small compared to your full list of friends) because they won't be there. If you go make a bug report you will probably never find out if its a bug or if you were insta-blocked.
  Some people will be even more offended if they are instantly blocked than if they are blocked after a period of time.
  Posted 12 months ago by Treesa | Permalink
- I've sometimes wondered why that feature was put in. Why would someone need to know where anyone else is? It doesn't bother me though.
  Posted 12 months ago by Tilwithe | Permalink
- I am quite perplexed as to why you think this is an issue. What are you afraid of them seeing or want to keep private? All those who have added you can see is that at this moment in time you are in Groddle Forrest Junction, and are getting your watering can ready to water a fruit tree. You got music box DR - 3, your third for the day. Those who have added you can now read your thoughts, and can hear your indecision about whether to wait to get a fourth DR-3 or to donate the three music boxes now to Friendly...anyway you get my point.
  In all seriousness, as others have said if anyone did stalk you, there is the option of block and to report them.
  Posted 12 months ago by Oristia | Permalink
- I actually don't have a problem with it, but I only find it odd that I appear as a friend on their list when I have not even accepted them. But thanks to WindBorn for the suggestion of block then unblock which worked.
  Posted 12 months ago by Vinchon | Permalink
- Well, I've already blocked a few because we had no prior interaction, and being a victim of violent crime and still quite wary of the world, it kinda creeps me out that people have the ability (aside from TS) to track my movements without my express permission (by friending back) and a great deal of work and wasted time on their part.
  Thanks, Windborn for the suggestion, but it does still mean I have to opt out, which isn't imo an appropriate model. However, until such time as TS maybe sorts this out a bit better, it's a very helpful suggestion to avoid quasi-permanently bombing someone out that may be a perfectly normal person who just friended me with no intentions of harm/foul.
  Posted 12 months ago by Woochi | Permalink
- That's not a middle ground. The majority of these people I want to be friends with - I just don't want friends or non-friends to see where I am all the time.
  I also want the ability to be "invisible" sometimes (people can't IM me in-game the second I log on), or have some sort of "safe list" where certain people can see I'm online, but the rest cant.
  Pie in the sky, sure, but just having a bit more control over my privacy settings besides "block them. Then unblock them." would be nice.
  Look, for all the people who don't "get it," I understand. You don't have an issue with people seeing where you are, because it's just a game, and this isn't real life.
  But when I log in, I get a LOT of IMs. People see I'm on and want to talk to me. Sometimes this is awesome. Sometimes, I just want to check in and do some mining. I don't want to go to parties, and I don't want to talk to fifteen people.
  I don't want to tell each person to go away - though I can politely say "thanks, no thanks," more often than not that hurts people's feelings and they try to ask, "well why not," or "are you sure?" or "But it's awesome!"
  I sure as hell do NOT want to block these people. These are people I do consider friends who I DO want to talk to, go to parties with, and invite places. Removing them from my list, or me from their list is absolutely not an option.
  So my solution? I don't log in.
  Posted 12 months ago by Xev | Permalink
- Meh, that happens to me all the time. I just tell them the truth: I logged on to do a little mining or I'm not in the mood to be social. If that upsets somebody, then oh well -- they were probably a bit too touchy to begin with.
  But somebody help me out: in what way could anyone use your location within Ur against you?
  Posted 12 months ago by Red Sauce | Permalink
- What would make more sense is the option to check in in 'invisible' mode. Skype has that, as do some other IM protocols. You can check in 'regularly', or 'invisible'.
  I'm assuming the reason it is like it is is because Glitch is a social game where people interact with each other. "I don't want to interact with most people, or even anybody" is sort of opposed to a fundamental goal of the game.
  Posted 12 months ago by WalruZ | Permalink
- I'm getting confused by people jumping to the assumption that when a person says that *sometimes* they want to be solitary, that they mean they *never* want to be social and therefore they're "opposed to a fundamental goal of the game". Not so! Sometimes =/= never.
  The fundamental goal of the game is not to interact with each other IMO; it's to have an enjoyable time so that there is a reason to keep coming back to it. Interaction with other players is a very important aspect of the game, of course. But not fundamental. First and foremost, the game needs to be fun and that takes precedence over every other thing.
  Variety is the allspice of life! Why limit player's experiences and play styles? I sure dislike being told that there is only one way to play and/or enjoy the game and I'm sure I'm not the only one.
  Posted 12 months ago by Flowerry Pott | Permalink
- I wonder if Tiny Speck would agree with that, in part or in whole, and if so, why they bother to call this game a social MMO.
  But anyway, I still fail to see how such information provided on the profile provides someone with dangerous personal information or prevents people from playing in a non-social manner.
  I see it as much ado about nothing.
  Posted 12 months ago by Red Sauce | Permalink
- Hey Saucelah? Where has someone said that "Information provided on the profile provides someone with dangerous personal information," or "prevents people from playing in a non-social manner"?
  I've read through this topic a few times, so maybe I'm just missing it, but as far as I can tell, no one has said that. If this comes down to just elaborating on our various points, I'd be happy to explain further about mine. I'm also not sure what you mean by that last one, "preventing people from playing in a non-social manner,"
  If you mean that the game doesn't easily allow for me to log in and play without being social, I fail to see how you haven't understood that it's a barrier. I get that YOU don't have a problem telling people you're just mining. I don't have a problem telling them. I have a problem getting them to accept that and go about their merry way.
  I'm not interested in being bitchy with my Glitch friends. Telling them I'm just logged on to mine is one thing, but we have a pretty varied group of people who play. Some people are like you and me, where they go, "Oh cool, catch you later,"
  Others aren't. That doesn't mean that I can't be friends with them or dislike them. I also don't want to hurt their feelings. It bugs me that because you haven't run into this particular issue that suddenly the idea of needing better security settings is unimportant. I'm delighted you haven't run into this. And I get that you select your friends differently than I do.
  It's an issue for me. It's an issue for the OP. It's an issue for others as well. The tl;dr is that we need a middle ground between blocking and being friends. That's it. Your being dismissive is insulting.
  Posted 12 months ago by Xev | Permalink
- I guess in your situation Xev like you suggested earlier , I think the feature of your current status would work. Like I use steam and I can set my status to busy, and when I do that I no longer see messages. Or I can even appear offline but still be able to play games.
  Posted 12 months ago by Vinchon | Permalink
- Vinchon - I agree 100%. That's what I mean; I'm not asking for the moon here, I'm asking for a middle ground between the two extremes. Being able to be "away" or "busy" when logged in (or hell, even "invisible"), is all I want.
  I'm advocating for increased privacy preferences overall. I don't personally care what people find on my profile, but I understand that others do.
  Here's a real life example: In another thread right now (that shall not be named), a player just started posting crap about another player based on information learned from a link in their profile. With increased privacy settings, we'd have the option of making our profile links visible to only friends, or certain friends, not the world at large.
  Posted 12 months ago by Xev | Permalink
- Oh what about adding something like a answering machine feature as well. When you set your status as busy you don't see any messages but messages get sent to your answering machine. Mainly because you might not know if someone has something important to say.
  And you can even set your own personal message like, "I'm currently mining leave a message and I'll hit you up later!" or use a default one like, "Xev is not here at the moment please leave a message after the beep."
  Posted 12 months ago by Vinchon | Permalink
- I think it would be cool if there were a PM feature overall, regardless of whether or not the status of the player is set to "busy."
  Mail is one thing, but sending messages to other players is one thing we haven't really seen. You HAVE to be logged into the game to read them. It would be nice to have an option to be sent an email alert when you receive a PM from a user. *shrug*
  There's a lot of stuff that could happen. It's gonna take a while for TS to come up with a solution that works not only with the game, but with itself. These are all excellent ideas, but they could easily become redundant or even conflict with other ideas. I put a lot of faith in TS to come up with a solution that improves what's there without detracting from the spirit of the game. I don't necessarily know what that solution is, but something more than what we have now would rock.
  Posted 12 months ago by Xev | Permalink